Sitting in it

 I haven't been communicative with anyone, lately. I haven't kept up the blog, I have been relatively quiet at home. My bariatric fitness/nutrition group hasn't heard from me, I have just been quiet on all fronts. Some of this was the result of a technical issue, but more and more it has become me just sitting in my stuff. 

The semester came to a close this week. Today was the winter commencement at the university and I turned in my final assignment for the first half of my master's program a couple of days ago. This semester has been stressful in so many ways and I definitely started to backslide on my weight loss goals. The stress and anxiety built and I found myself feeling the depression that is common with it for me and I, of course, turned to food. I haven't been eating the way I should and it has caused some regain. 

I have been struggling with so much lately and this break is desperately needed. It won't be a real break because I will have plenty to do, but it is the sort of thing I enjoy doing. I will be working on things for Scouts and spending time with my family. That is what I am looking forward to and getting myself back on track. 

Let's do this

Tomorrow is December 1st. I have obviously been terrible at keeping up with this blog, but I really want it to be a place for accountability for me. So, December 1st will be a new start. A fresh take. We'll see how it goes. 

Over a year has come and gone since my surgery and I am not where I wanted to be at this point. My mindset on things means I am sitting here being overly critical of myself and chastising my choices. Make no mistake, it was my own doing that this happened. I let myself slip into some bad habits and as a result my weight loss was not as much as it could have, and should have been. 

On the bright side, a lot has happened since I was regularly updating this blog and of course I have plenty of things I can talk about. Whether it be as a bariatric patient, a Scouter, or other things in my life like Freemasonry, owning dogs, all that fun stuff, I can find things to talk about if I put my mind to it. So, I am going to schedule time every day to sit down and put down some thoughts on here. Let's see how long it lasts! 

A New Adventure

 Things have been a little busy since the Jamboree. Not that I haven't had time to write anything, here, but I haven't been motivated to do so. I could have made a post or several but opted not to. So let's play a little catch up. 

A lot of things happened over the summer and I will make sure to cover some of that in future posts. For now, know that I came home from Jamboree with COVID. I have been struggling to balance work, home, Scouts, and grad school. It isn't easy. I am about to take on the role of Council Commissioner, and I have fortunately found someone to pick up the District Commissioner mantle. So that is where things stand right now. Lots going on, busy busy busy. 

I have also started working with a trainer/coach to try to get my weight loss rebooted. We shall see. I really need to adjust my relationship with food, though. Seriously. That is my biggest issue. But, we'll talk about that another day. 

NSJ 2023 - Day -3

 I say yesterday was day negative three because Wednesday, the day units arrive, is day zero. Today was the first day the majority of the Jamboree Service Team (JST) was on site at the Summit Bechtel Reserve. This includes myself. My journey started earlier in the week, though, as I prepped my clothes for the event by spraying everything with a healthy dose of permethrin. I don't mess around when it comes to ticks. 

Clothes drying after a healthy dose of permethrin

Then came the packing. I went over the list many times and packed way more than needed, but the motto of our movement is Be Prepared, and I wanted to be sure that I was. Unfortunately, I would come to learn later my shortcomings in that regard. 

On Sunday, the big day arrived. I got up at my normal time, fed all the pets, hung out with them in the living room, and then said my goodbyes to them and my wife and drove up I-81 towards the Summit. 

On the road

I took my time, mostly because I-81 is a mess of things on a good day, so it took me around two-and-a-half hours to reach the Ruby Welcome Center. Unfortunately I left my phone in the car during this part so I have no pictures, but it was a quick in and out to get registered and I was off to the south gate of the property and making my way to Sub Camp Charlie 4. Once there, I unloaded my gear and got to work helping to set up our staff tents. 

Big welcome to Jambo sign

At lunch time I realized my error in planning. Lunches were bagged and handed out at breakfast, which I was not present for. This meant I was without a lunch and had already exhausted my meager calories from the morning. I wandered up to Piggot Dining Hall and found a friendly face, asking for some extra bag lunches to bring back. 

Lunch time at C4

It was a long day of this as the tents were new to most of us and so every new group of staffers that arrived had to watch and learn. Eventually, though, all of our tents were up and we had our first staff meeting where instead of working we could sit and chat. All of this was done just in time for dinner. So we made our way to Piggot for dinner and those of us who hadn't parked our cars in the required place went off to do so. 

First staff meeting, in the shade and outside of the tent because it was cooler than inside.

Upon my return I began to get things ready for my first night. Here is where I discovered my hubris. I had not packed a mask for my CPAP machine. I was a bit panicked as going without is never good. I called my wife and asked her to overnight me one, which she kindly agreed to do the next day. Still, I was without my machine for the night in an unfamiliar and uncomfortable place. Needless to say, I did not sleep well, which may explain why I am posting this at the hour I am. 

Laying in my cot

Still, for my first day on site it was pretty good. It's nice meeting new people that share a passion for our program. Now, Forward to day -2 where we will be cleaning latrines and marking campsites to prep for our units. 

First Trip to the Summit

I am going to be on the Jamboree Service Team (JST) for the National Scout Jamboree (NSJ) in 2023 at the Summit Bechtel Reserve (SBR) this summer. I will be a member of the commissioner corps for Subcamp Charlie 4 which means I will be working with units to make sure they get that they need from us. It is my first time as a JST member, my second NSJ overall, and I had never been to SBR. That was, until March 31st. 

There was a site visit at SBR for the Contingent Operations team that weekend. Most of the C4 leadership was unable to attend, so I volunteered since the location is not far from me. I was excited the whole time leading up to it because I was looking forward to visiting the property. I'll be honest, when I saw this sign I got very excited. 

When I arrived it was a pretty low-key situation. Things didn't really kick off until lunch, which was Subway sandwiches. We had some introductory training sessions and then I was able to take part in a UTV/ROV training. This is required to drive the vehicles on the SBR property and was a lot of fun, especially given the rain we were dealing with. 

Anyway, the rest of the weekend was a lot of fun with trainings, informational sessions, and fellowship. I also got to visit our campsites for this summer. We looked at the layouts and took stock of the sites to see what maintenance may be needed. 

During lunch, we had an opportunity to get something branded. As I used to be a bear, this was an obvious choice. 

The afternoon was more training and sessions to discuss logistics of the event. Lots of information to take in while the wind kicked up and was blowing small dust storms everywhere since the rain had stopped. The rest of the evening was pretty quiet. Dinner, lounging about, typical conference activities. At least the view was nicer than most conferences I have been to. 

All in all I would say it was an excellent trip to the Summit for my first time. I am looking even more Forward (iykyk) to the summer, especially because it shouldn't be snowing any time while I am there. 

See you at NSJ 2023 if you will be there!

Stalling Out

 I have stalled, both in keeping up with this blog and with the weight loss. A little over a month, now, five weeks ago, I had a cholecystectomy. Otherwise known as having my gallbladder removed. The result of this was being told to take it easy, not lift anything over ten pounds for six weeks, etc., etc. 

Now, I haven't followed these instructions to a T. I have certainly lifted things heavier than I should have by now but it did result in me breaking my behaviors developed since surgery that resulted in my weight loss. I haven't put weight back on, but I have stayed within the same five pounds for a month, now. 

I need to do better. Not just on my activity and eating habits, but also keeping up with this. So I am going to work on that. Right now, though, I am getting ready to leave work so I can see my endocrinologist and then go home and rest. I am very tired, today. Tomorrow is a new day, though. 

Milestones

 Today, I hit a big milestone. The scale read under 250 pounds for the first time for me in well over 20 years. I have been seeing more progress in my sizing than on the scale, but this is a big moment. It's not the "onederland" that many people look forward to, but it is a nice stop on that ride. This journey certainly isn't done, though.